If I loved you a little less,
your half would have felt complete
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She wished the storm outside would never stop.
“Hey.” His voice sounded like it was coming from behind the glass, the rain and the wind.
Her tired form was sitting on the couch, her hands joined together between her knees. Her eyes were empty as she turned her face to look at him sitting on the table in front of her.
He knew then, but he did not want to believe it.
He took her hands, holding them separately in his. She took them away, making him frown as he let go.
She shook her head and her lips trembled. There was so much she wanted to say, so much she knew he could say. But she was tired and afraid of living the next day like today.
“You know, I love you.” He sat on his knees, his head closer to hers as he placed his hands on her nape, feeling her heightened pulse. It calmed him. She was still there with him.
She gave him a nod. Yes. She knew.
“Then, please… Please, love! Don’t do this.” He shook his head, his eyes begged as he took her chin in his hand to make her look at him.
“I am sorry… I am. But tell me. If you had the chance to meet her again, kiss her…” She touched her own lips, and her breath hitched at the last question, “to love her. Won’t you go?”
His hands fell from her face, and he gulped. He shook his head again, “No. Don’t.” He brought her closer to him with her waist.
Her eyes burned, “I have tried. I have tried so hard to forget. But I wake up every day with this question. And I… I sleep with it. What if? What if I wake up one day and you are not there beside me. You have left. And I won’t even hate you for it. It would just hurt. It would hurt so much that I can feel it now. I feel it every day, every moment. And I can’t get it out of my head!” She clutched her head with her hands. It felt like it was going to burst with how hot it was getting when she couldn’t control her tears.
Her hands fell from her head and she clutched her heart. She could barely speak. Yet she continued, “I hate…I hate feeling this. Sometimes, I wish I never met you. Or I didn’t know about her. Or I could forget about her. But I can’t. I can’t do anything. I can’t stop loving you.” She clutched his shirt now, angry at him for making her feel this way, to not be able to stop her feel this way, “And I don’t want to. I don’t know what to do. Tell me, Just, please tell me!” She sobbed, still holding him.
He couldn’t. So, he took her face in his hands and kissed her with all the love he had for her. He kissed her chin. He kissed her lids, her nose, her forehead, and the side of her lips till her breath slowed down.
It was her turn. She took his chin in her right hand, and looked in his eyes. Her nose was red, and her lips still quivered around the words as a single tear escaped.
“If I loved you a little less, your half would have felt complete.”
The storm still raged on outside.
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Till the next one,
I heard that if you live in Delhi but don't speak a whole lot of Hindl people think less of you. So I think more of you because I live in a part of New Jersey where nobody speaks Hindi. If I could move to Edison which makes sense because people born in India or who were born in India illuminate the rest of the world with their life force and part of that is speaking a lot of Hindi. So about this story. Your translation of Hindi into English is so much better than the Hindi translated into English using Google Translate which is why Bollywood producers will start screaming at you if you dare use Google Translate to convert their Hindi filmscript into English. Google translates it as, "A little bit of love for you if it were less your incomplete love we feel poor." Like a really dumb guy or AI, Google has no sense of nuance. But I am not meaning to criticize Google because it is sort of going in the right direction. In Hindi one word can mean so many things and then all the words have to connect with one another exactly so concise exact complete understanding is difficult to reach. The cool 😎 thing is that this is exactly what is going on in this story. The guy thinks if the girl loves him enough, she will allow him to carry on with this other girl. A very shallow dude. What he misses is that if she loved him less or not a lot, she would be fine with his shopping or at least move on and shop around herself for a different better guy. The guy doesn't know that if a girl loves him completely then if he shopping around on the sly for another girl, she's not going to tolerate it. But she loves him so much that the loss is so incredibly great versus if she loved him less.
This a great story but the thing with great stories or making them even greater is not to tell them too much. It's like a good scene in an excellent rom-com. The scene only lasts a short time so you only want the actions that will hint at what's going on and let the audience figure it out. Which you do well in how he kisses her nose, chin, forehead so to indicate his love is complete, which is bahut guilty hai bilco bahut gulty hai. Her response is to turn away as though if he doesn't have enough love or any love, not enough love for her to not go shopping around for another girl. So the great part of this is suspense, what will happen. If you have it on DVD or can stream it, maybe look at the early breakup scene in the film "Queen" just to get some clues on what you exactly need to have or majorly help the story spring forward with what could happen. I do think it is a great little story almost like the excellent opening to a great Hindi film but I would just say totally be yourself in how what you think will happen and what will be said and done or not and how thecstory goes. A good story even if short is like a good Hindi film. Apologies if this is sort of rambling but this is a great little story and reminds me why Queen was so good and Kangana Madam is so good. Keep going!
Loved it!
And specially that shayari at the end! <3